“It’s always darkest before day” is a quote we hear a lot that perfectly captures a spiritual process called “The Dark Night of the Soul”.
What is “The Dark Night of the Soul” ?
“The Dark Night of the Soul” is a stage of spiritual awakening characterized by major shifts and events in different aspects in our personal lives – be it a career, relationships, mindset, belief system, etc. –
that completely rocks us to the core.
This concept is not new. A lot of religions have teachings that specifically deal with the “Dark Night.” It even exists in mythology and psychology (it just varies by name).
Dark Night in psychology
In psychology, it can be compared to the Theory of “Positive Disintegration” (TPD) which proposes that signs of mental illness, negative habits and thought patterns, existential crises and other adversities signal the start of an evolution process towards reaching one’s most altruistic self.
The “Dark Night of the Soul” is an integral part of one’s spiritual development, the essence of which is that a person must go through the most difficult stage in their life, and those who can break the surface emerge to be a higher version of themselves than they were prior to the “Dark Night.”
A person can go through one, two, multiple “Dark Nights” within their lifetime, and with every single one, there’s always going to be some lesson to be learned or a cycle to repeat that ultimately leads us to our true soul purpose.
Coming out of the dark – Libby Robertson
In one episode of the Architects of Destiny Podcast with Aeron Lazar and Riya Loveguard, Libby Robertson, author of “How To Unmess Your Life” talked about a period in her life when she felt like a lost soul, caught in the web of chasing material pleasures and wrong people, and eventually hitting rock bottom.
“I was a party girl. I loved to drink. I loved to take recreational drugs. I had a terrible relationship with money. I was always able to manifest everything that I wanted, but I was seeking anything outside of me to fill this void that I was just experiencing every single day,” Libby said.
Often, she would drink and do or say things that were deeply harmful to herself and the people around her. She also developed an eating disorder on top of her smoking and alcoholism.
At a certain point, she ended up being hospitalized from suffering from a concussion. Everything spiraled down thereafter. It signaled the darkest time in her life.
“I really got a rude wake-up call. I lost everything. I found myself at a hospital. I moved back with my parents. I had not even zero dollars, I had negative dollars. Me and my boyfriend broke up,” she said.
Libby found herself crying in bed one night after partying too much to drown out the darkness within her soul, praying to God to help her find her purpose.
“I was at the stage in my journey where I realized that I wasn’t living the life that I came in this human life to live. I knew that I was so off-path. I knew that life was meant to be joyful. I knew that there was something that I was here to do. I knew that there was a better way of life, and I felt so helpless because I couldn’t figure out what it was that I was meant to be doing,” she said.
Self-healing according to Libby Robertson
And so, Libby began a journey of self-healing, creating her own happiness, and re-discovering her life purpose, which she touched up on in her book.
Trying to pull herself back up, Libby started working on her mind first.
“I began to realize that there was more than just the mind, like I already had this belief that you can choose your attitude, and this is so key because choice is where we get to reclaim our power,” Libby said, adding that committing to a path of one’s choosing is important.
Libby also listened to a lot of spiritual healing podcasts, which was where she truly realized that she wasn’t alone on her journey, that millions of people are also going through similar experiences.
She also began learning about past life regression, dream interpretations, journaling, and basically, getting to know herself on a deeper, more spiritual level.
Finding Purpose After the Chaos
Being able to separate oneself from the patterns that society has forced upon us is the first step in finding one’s true soul purpose.
As humans, we have been exposed to collective imprints and three-dimensional programming from the moment we were born. Programming which basically ascribes life purpose with some kind of career, profession, or any other material endeavor that is accepted by society and perceived by many as “successful.”
Often, we don’t realize these programs are not always in alignment with our individual soul mission, which we forget upon incarnation and reincarnation.
According to Libby Robertson, getting caught up by these collective imprints can be misleading – like the blind following the blind. Instead of listening to the dictates of society, finding one’s unique mission starts from looking inward and really listening to your soul.
Libby Robertson emphasized the importance of making conscious choices in order to come to terms with the massive changes, loss, and breakdowns that the Dark Night of the Soul can bring.
In consciously choosing one’s truths, choosing to acknowledge one’s experiences, choosing to rise above it all, and choosing to use it as a gift, do we truly understand that we are the creators of our own reality and that we can choose to transform along with our surroundings – no matter how many “Dark Nights” come our way.
“What is really important is that we commit to ourselves first and foremost and then everything else kind of fades away. And then choose to see things in an empowering way. You know that we have that choice that’s available to us,” Libby Robertson said.
“What I’ve been through, I’ve chosen to take all of that and rise with it, it is a gift. I’ve chosen to use it as depth to create. You know, the more depth that we have within us, the more light that we can hold,” she added.
Then, when you’re ready, a part of the healing process is to share the experience and the wisdom you gained to the world.
“This is the time where we get to have these open and honest conversations of what we either have experienced or what we are experiencing and when everything’s out in the open,” she said.
“When we can lead the way, by even just having these conversations, but go through this healing journey and have this beautiful openness about us, then this is really when collective healing begins to take place as well,” Libby concluded.
Summary – The Dark Night of Soul
The Dark Night of the Soul really is a difficult phase to overcome. Everyone is on a unique path, and so one’s “Dark Night” can look a lot different from another person’s.
Nevertheless, welcoming the pain and heartbreak in the same way we welcome joy and happiness, is one way to truly get the full, first row view of our beautiful journey.
Acknowledging the darkness instead of drowning in it, and believing in the resurgence of light, is how we make the most of this amazing human experience, never forgetting that our journey is always leading us to the fulfillment of our soul purpose.