Nervous System Regulation with Kelly Bowen

Today’s guest is not just an amazing entrepreneur who has built an innovative finance brokerage in Australia, but she is also a very evolved soul whose life journey revealed to her the dynamics of our mental environment in connection to our manifestations and abundance.

In this episode of the Architects of Destiny Podcast, we sat down with Kelly Bowen, owner of the Lifestyle Finance Australia, to talk about nervous system regulation and how we come to develop defense mechanisms that are blocking us from living in our highest timeline and from a well-rounded soul journey.

This episode was quite special because we deviated a little bit from our usual topics and deep dived more into human psychology, and how it ultimately either disrupts the harmony needed to manifest our dream life or completely flips our lives for the better.

Kelly also teaches us how to zero in on our dysregulated nervous system, trace our trauma responses, anchor ourselves better, create a safe emotional space within ourselves and ultimately create harmony between our mind (and the imagined life we want to live) and our physical, bodily responses.

Watch the trailer on nervous system and emotional regulation

Watch the full episode with Kelly Bowen


[ 00:50 ] How nervous system dysregulation affects manifestation 

[ 02:35] The nervous system + Quantum Field connection 

[04:21 ]  Dysregulated nervous system vs. Well-functioning nervous system

[ 05:29]  Fight, Flight, Freeze or Fawn

[ 11:44]  Slowing down to identify the “Stages of Arousal”

[17:05 ]  What to do when your defense mechanism acts up

[20:44 ]  “Flight Mode” in Business People

[ 24:34]  Normalizing abundance, love, and joy

[ 32:02] Giving Sovereignty Back To Business Clients

[ 34:47]  Other resources discussing dysregulated nervous system, etc.

Nervous system regulation and manifestation 

Being a businesswoman, Kelly has had her fair share of ups and downs in her personal life that has greatly affected her mental well-being over the past few years, urging her to a journey of self-discovery.

Along the way, she has learned about nervous system regulation (and dysregulation), defense mechanisms, trauma responses, and all that jazz of the 3D human experience.

In the process of healing, Kelly caught a pattern in her life, where she would manifest a desired outcome in one aspect, and then lose something precious in another aspect.

“The way I used to manifest was, I’d manifest my dreams and desires and yet at the same time, I was creating so much chaos. I was having extreme highs and extreme lows simultaneously,” Kelly said. “Like, I’d be having my best months in business, then my cat gets hit by a car and all the money that I’ve made goes to saving my cat. I’m falling in love, but I’m now in a fight with my best friend and we’re not talking for 6 months. I’m constantly in these loops. I was like, ‘why the hell is this happening?’”

Nervous system, the Quantum Field and Ascension

Later on, Kelly would discover that the nervous system is connected to the Quantum Field in a way that most people are not much aware of.

“Despite my best conscious efforts of trying to control what I was doing, there was this whole other aspect that seemed completely out of my control, and it wasn’t until I understood nervous system regulation because our nervous system is literally the electrical pulses that we’re making into the Quantum Field in terms of our vibrational point of attraction. Because we don’t attract what we are, we attract who we are,” she said.

Until we understand the dynamics of our nervous system in relation to the Quantum Field, we can never truly hold power over our own selves, our own destiny, and the kind of life we create on this planet.

“That’s when the real power happens and that’s when it allows us to ascend into higher states of consciousness and evolve beyond where we are with more grace and ease, and also allows us in a more direct path to our desires,” she said.

What is a dysregulated nervous system?

Basically, a dysregulated nervous system is the opposite of a well-regulated nervous system. A regulated nervous system is feeling centered and grounded in your body, with an open and joyful feeling in your heart. A dysregulated nervous system is all about chaos, worry, paranoia, and finding little to no reason for joy. It can be a myriad of things and is often caused by some emotional trauma or mental imbalance.

“The way our body communicates dysregulation is through fight, flight, freeze or fawn, Kelly explained. 

“Most people are familiar with the fight, flight, or freeze, but the fawn is the ‘I will forgo all of my needs to make sure you’re okay in the moment, because if you’re not okay, I can’t be okay,’” she said.

The “fawn” defense mechanism is very common in entrepreneurs, Kelly said, as building and operating a business can often revolve around “the customer is always right” mentality. It’s the over-giving, under-selling, and under-valuation of yourself and your business for fear of losing customers and clients.

This kind of vibration often takes a chunk off your business and reverberates back into our energetic field, causing unexpected mayhem.

How do we regulate our nervous system?

“The first thing is I just take some time to find your center,” Kelly advised. “I completely remove myself from the situation and I take some time to find my center and it’s the best start to come back into my heart. And depending upon which defense mechanism I fell into, it can depend upon different pathways out of that.”

According to Kelly, it’s important to ground yourself first to be able to identify which defense mechanism you’re playing into and therefore, seek the corresponding remedy. Beforehand, though, Kelly has identified Three (3) Stages of Arousal for herself which, if unhampered, often leads to dysregulation, namely:

First Stage: The “Meerkat” Stage – where the amygdala (the fear-detecting part of our brain( is activated and gathers pieces of information to assess threats in our environment; 

Second Stage: The “Assemble The Army” Stage – where, as a defense mechanism, you gather your “fighting tools” and just wait for someone to pull the trigger first before you wage into war.

Third Stage: The “Charge!” Stage – where your complete nervous system is hijacked and you slip into the “fight, flight, freeze” or “fawn” mode.

Kelly says that it’s important to catch which stage you’re on early enough to bring yourself back to center.

These concepts are discussed in detail in this episode, and it’s truly an eye-opener! So go ahead and watch or listen to the episode, and don’t forget to share it to your friends!

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riya loveguard & aeron lazar